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Category Archives: Personal

Belated Happy Fathers’ Day Post

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Belated Happy Fathers’ Day Post

Something amazing and touching started happening in my life since Father’s Day last Sunday (June 15, 2014). It was the day before my dad’s birthday. Usually, his birthday would be the same day as Fathers’ Day. That’s how special my dad is. Okay, I’ll stop telling too much sweet words about my Dad. I’m not used to it anymore, but I love him so much.

We weren’t able to celebrate Fathers’ Day the way we celebrate it before, but the Ushering Ministry where my parents are a part of did the celebration by eating the food that Mom prepared for everyone. It made me feel a bit sad because I was guessing that Dad might be disappointed that his birthday or Daddy day wasn’t celebrated by the family. It made me think of what to do for him on his birthday. Oh, well. I simply bought a Knorr soup for him to cook because it reminds me a lot of my childhood with him.

That wasn’t the only thing that amazed me during those days (June 15 and 16). During the 3 P.M. Sunday service, there was this boy who sat with his mom in one chair beside me because there was only one free seat, making them share for that seat (don’t worry, I was also a bit confused about how I exaggerated the usage of the word “seat” in that sentence). I didn’t know why but I had this urge to give him my seat (and another one here). By the way, before they sat beside me, the little kid was poking my button pins on my bag (BMO and Jake the Dog pins). I had an idea, “Why not give this to the kid later after the service?” The service went on, and I gave the boy my seat for him to be able to sit well because sharing a seat with his mom may be uncomfortable. I stood up near the tech booth beside my Dad. Hearing Dad laugh at every joke that the speaker says at the stage made my heart glad; it also made him pat me at the back, and kiss my scalp.. did that sound okay? Let me rephrase it.. He kissed my head.. Top of my head. Haha.

Before the service ended, we prayed for the daddies in the church, and went on. I approached the kid and his Mom right away to hand him my BMO button pin, “Hello~ Would you like to keep this? This will be yours now.” His Mom smiled, and looked at her son, pointing at the pin I was holding. I wasn’t able to understand what she was saying to her son, then the kid accepted the pin I gave him. He was so cute~ He seemed to be so shy while he took it from my hand. When they walked past me, I almost cried. I was so happy and overjoyed. Truly, God’s overflowing grace and love can be evident in a person. That’s one testimony to prove that.

Picture not mine! :<

Picture not mine! :<

A Past Hobby

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A Past Hobby

For now, let me share with you a story about my pastime since I was in Grade 2: Sketching. I won’t totally discuss how I got into this pastime (I’ll try to, but in my mind, it will be a part of this post), but I’ll describe how I sketch, and probably what I draw, then explain why.

When I was a little child, I was inspired to be a writer of fictional stories about princesses and the invisible people of this world for I was opened to a lot of fairy tale stories with princesses in it; That is normal for a little girl like me in my time. Along with my stories came drawings to illustrate it. My mother told me that I write good stories, so I pursued my writing and drawing (my Dad is a freelance artist that’s why I was inspired to draw also). Next, I became a fan of animé, specifically of Naruto (not Shippuden), since I was in fifth grade. My drawings started to improve because my friends gave me gifts: a sketch pad, pencils, and watercolor pencils. I was inspired to draw more. Because I was a fan of animé, my drawings looked like these:

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I cannot say that I was an otaku. Instead of digressing into the term otaku, I will go around the idea of my drawings as into the animé style. Animé was popularized by Japan. I like the way they played around with reality, especially with how they drew their characters. Animé is totally different with cartoons (specifically in America). I can say that Asians are really good in drawing (when I say Asian, I only refer to Koreans or Japanese because theirs are the only styles of drawing that I saw and knew). Far from being biased, I look at Japanese art in animé as fantastic. I cannot specify what made me dwell in the way they draw it, but I can only say that it really is amazing.

After my amazement with animé until my third year in High School, I suddenly became interested with drawing real people. Certain people-slash-friends of mine inspired me to draw people. I found a human’s eye to be dazzling. When I entered College, the people around me helped me to be a more observant person, making me more logical and critical in analyzing people – their behavior and the like. I concluded, upon observing people who are close to me and even those who aren’t, that the eyes of a person speak a lot about who they are – their thoughts, what they want to say, what they intend to do or to say, and how they feel at the moment. Whenever I draw this time, I emphasize the beauty of their eyes, or sometimes I draw eyes alone, randomly. Because I loved eyes, I started to become a total fan of ball-jointed dolls, particularly those from Korea. They look so realistic, and they usually become the subjects of my drawings. Their beauty made me insecure at first, but I started to appreciate my beauty as a creation of God sooner after that. The dolls’ eyes gave them life, really.

Images of the BJDs aren't mine.

 

A past hobby, indeed, that turned into still, a hobby. Didn’t I make any sense with that sentence? Today, I’m still trying to draw more people, but my laziness keeps me from doing it. For now, I’m writing essays and poems – that’s my hobby for now.

Escolta and Art

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Escolta and Art

I can say that this is a “Real Junior Now” semi-part two blog post of mine. Check the “Real Junior Now” here, if you want to read it: https://whoismaria.wordpress.com/2014/05/24/real-junior-now/. This will be a deeper and more personal blog post for me, and it will be a bit artsy (I hope not).

As I said in my recent blog post, I went to Escolta. I walked from Quiapo church to Escolta which takes less than a kilometer, I guess. While walking, I was observing the surroundings and the landmarks I passed by: the Quiapo church, the Quinta Market, the people who were selling, along with those buying in the sidewalk, the BPI building, and the other old buildings found along the Escolta street. I appreciated the architecture of the old buildings, particularly its neo art deco style. My previous subject, Philippine Art and Design History, made me appreciate the Philippine architecture during the early 20th century. Escolta was being eyed on by groups of people who are interested in the cultural heritage lately, I suppose.

During my stay in the organization’s office, I learned a lot from the curator-speaker-lecturer that time. She made me realize that it’s not really more about the art or the “object” made. It is more about the artist – his/her experiences and creativity as an artist. It inspired me to promote the artists more. It made me feel more of being an arts manager. She taught me to look at the artists differently, that they are human beings like us. The only difference is that art is their way of life and, their creativity never leaves them. Their mind and wild imagination keeps them living and breathing. Just the thought of it keeps me motivated to push through becoming an arts manager in the near future.

Real Junior Now

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Real Junior Now

Yesterday, I went to a meeting with a curator, Miss Dayang Yraola along with some friends-slash-blockmates for an arts project as our internship. INTERNSHIP. I will be having an internship already! I can’t “somehow” believe that I’m an intern now because I am only an eighteen-year old yet I’ll be working with art projects, international artists, and curators. It’s exciting because it makes me feel like I will be a legit arts manager soon.The meeting was held in the organization’s office at Escolta, so going there from our house through commuting was a bit hassle for me because I have to choose between two options: ride the FX to Quiapo then walk to Escolta, or ride the FX to SM North EDSA, ride a jeep to LRT, then simply ride the LRT to Carriedo. I chose Option A. I love adventures, and the first option saves more money than the second one.

I wasn’t lost. I was able to go to Escolta safely without a friend, and I walked towards the location with the (guessing) knowledge of how to go there from Quiapo church. Plus, I wasn’t late for the meeting-slash-lecture! Throughout the meeting, I learned more about the art project where I will be be a part of, the tasks that I will be soon accomplishing and crowd funding. I realized that I need to know what I really can do and what I want in life because my learning ground won’t be the school anymore sooner. I lived long enough in my fantasy, not in the reality where I must be living. But I guess I need to live in my fantasy now and then to keep myself inspired.

Going to school with my friends-slash-blockmates, we rode the LRT altogether. Aren’t we sweet? Anyway, we met our (kind and probably an awesome) professor from our TECWRI (Technical Writing for Arts Management) class. We were late for almost an hour, and she dismissed the class earlier than the usual time (it should’ve been 17:40, but we were dismissed at almost 16:10).

I’ll have another blog post for personal reflections during that particular day. Please do get ready for a semi-artsy blog post every week. I’ve been gone for a long time now. I apologize. I was too lazy to open my blog and post random stuff again. Someday soon, I’ll post about my personal life, like how I’ve been doing these days. Thank you for continuously reading my blog posts! If you are fond of poems and personal sentiments, feel free to follow or read my posts in my other blog, mournwithtears.wordpress.com. God bless!

When I’m Feeling Down

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Picture not mine

Picture not mine

Yes, I also wondered why I posted this picture as a “cover picture” for this blog post of mine. I was really searching for quotes or photos of people that represent sadness or depression, but when I typed the word “down” with Google’s suggestion “feeling down”, this showed up and it made both me and my brother laugh. I love it when it happens.

Anyway, enough of Chewbacca. Time for another blooper moment. I typed “down” in Google Images search, and these were the images that appeared:

Image

Indeed, they’re down

I respect people who have down syndrome. They’re absolutely awesome. But when I’m so sad, and I was expecting for different results in Google Images, darn. I laughed a bit.

SERIOUSLY, enough of all these. I am so down, really. A lot of people who could see me personally can’t believe that I get down, that I get problems, that I have problems in managing time and that I have a hard time balancing my priorities. Why was I sad? Again, it’s because of my attitude. It feels as if I’m becoming too disrespectful to my parents. I have the guts to tell these things to you not because I’m proud of it, but because I believe that when the darkness is exposed to the light, it will vanish (Eph. 5:13). I learned it from my former leader in church.

When my parents touch me or talk to me, I become so irritated without knowing why. When they scold me when I do wrong, I complain, thinking, “That’s not even wrong! I am old enough to know what’s right and wrong.” My heart is becoming stubborn.

Have you ever felt this before? This feeling of thinking about a problem in your life; just a single problem in your life, then you’ll start over-thinking. When you started over-thinking, that problem becomes so big that you think the whole world is upon your shoulders. That’s a big problem now, and has become a burden in your heart too. That’s how I feel about myself now. But when I think about it, I battle it with a positive thought, “I’m fighting with it. I don’t have to stay down.” But you know what? I’m still down.

What I forgot was GOD. I put God out of my life. I put God out of the context. I put Him out of my mind and heart, in my soul and strength. I am not fighting WITH Him. I choose to forget about Him, and do it all on my own believing that I can. Yes, it’s said in Phil. 4:13 that “I can do all things through Christ Who strengthens me.” but am I really putting Christ as I apply it in my life? I try to change my attitude. I try to change my thinking. I try to change every negative thing in me without God’s help. I hope to practice and apply it in my life from now on. Putting God in every situation I’m in since I can’t really do this alone.

Let’s FIGHT on!

Something I Won’t Forget

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I guess lots of people that I know were wondering why I didn’t post anything for HYDE’s birthday yesterday. I wanted to post a birthday greeting for him online but I was too tired, I read instead. FYI, I didn’t forget his birthday, and that’s something I won’t forget. Someone who made an impact in my life. Someone who became a part of my life. Someone who has a special part in my heart. HYDE. Some may think, “Eew, he’s already 45 years old.” LOL. Yes, He’s already 45 years old. He inspired me a lot with the songs he wrote in L’Arc~en~Ciel and in VAMPS. He’s the vocalist for both bands. His voice never runs out of… beauty? I can’t describe it. His voice is so good. He’s one of these rock-band vocalists that has an overwhelming voice. I’ve been a fangirl since I’m 12 years old. Now, I’m 18 and still in love with this guy.

Hyde’s one of those people that I really NEED and WANT to meet in person. A friend-slash-blockmate of mine kept telling me that I deserve to meet my “biases”. HAHA. Oh well, if it’s God’s will, go on. But I’m really praying that I’ll meet them… especially HYDE.

TO HYDE:

Belated happy happy birthday to you! I really love you, but Megumi-san loves you more (and God loves you the most!). Hooray~ I’m so thankful to God that He gave you another year to inspire more people through your music. I hope that we’ll meet someday. And hey, please stop smoking (if possible). 😦 But I’m not imposing it to you.

Again, belated happy birthday to you!

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This picture is not mine

RandoMe

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This will be another personal and random blog post so don’t expect this to be something juicy like my previous posts… if they really were that juicy.

It’s been weeks since I last posted in my blog again. 😦 Sorry if you’re waiting for my blog posts and have nothing to post here. I have a lot of reasons, but.. Reasons are reasons. They show that if you give lots of reasons, it’s because you really don’t want to post. Okay, at times I’m so lazy to post here. But most of the time, I don’t know how to fix my thoughts and connect all of them. That’s how my posts are usually done, though (from how I see it). I can think logically about something, but I can’t explain my thoughts. I can’t turn my thoughts into words very well, and that’s what I hope to develop for myself through class reports and recitations (but I usually get really nervous).

I apologize if I won’t be able to post here for  awhile since I’ll surely be busy for the next few weeks. But I’ll find time to post here some day soon. 😀 Anyway, I want to share with you what’s happening with me recently.

It’s cool that I’m happily seeking God in my life again! I’m starting with little steps towards God. I’m going back to the basics again though it’s hard for me to read the Bible itself (so I usually read a book that has something to do with Christianity and God to read the Bible passages cited within its pages). I’m currently reading Susana Foth Aughtmon’s book, “All I Need Is Jesus And A Good Pair of Jeans” (three more chapters to go) and Aviad Kleinberg’s “7 Deadly Sins”. The latter is so deep with regards to the thoughts of the author. It’s a good-read for me so far (I’m still in Chapter 3).

I think that’s it for this blog post. God bless! Thank you for reading my random blog post + mini recent-stories.